Monday, January 10, 2011

Hoarders Season Finale: Glen and Lisa


Hear we go. The Rat King! I'm nervous for this.

Glen, self employed businessman, rat collector. He's dressed like a combo of The Dude and the Karate Kid.

Listen guys, he admits there are too many rats so let's just move along. He has well over a thousand, started with 4. Seriously, be careful when getting these types of pets. Rats DO make good pets, but not like this. Definatly not when the ground is completely covered with rats. They try to pull out his hair to build nests! They lick him in his sleep, lick his moist parts of his lip. (I hate the word "moist" as much as you, but it's what he said.)

Oh of course his best friend has a freaking mullet and handlebar mustache. Why wouldn't he? That's exactly the kind of person that would be friends with a rat king. He just dumps their feed all over the floor. His kitchen floor is a rat's nest. My mom used to call my hair a rat's nest. That really wasn't all that nice, Mom. (Just kidding. I don't care.)

9/11/89, nothing to do with 9/11 of 9/11 fame, but someone may try to take his version of 9/11 away from him. His wife died of a heart attack when she was 39. It must have happened in the car. She drove to the fire department, but she was slumped in her seat. It was too late. That's when the rats came in to help.

*Can't wait for Beyond Scared Straight! Know that!*

Glen says he would have to spend 20 hours a day taking care of his domesticated rats. He's the kind of guy that wears sunglasses inside. You gotta respect that kinda sass.

Robin Zasio! Poor Tonya Hoarding. At least we have our super team on this guy. Zasio and Paxton, get some!

Glen has a crazy cry. I thought I was a bad crier. Glen is worse off than me. He's upset because one of his favorite rat's died. Glen replaced his wife with rats. I would be really upset if I were her.

Glen says he's been trying to get this under control for two years.

MATT! America's hero! Seriously, every week he makes us fall deeper in love with him. Thank God Matt Paxton is on the case. The rat case has Paxton written all over it. That man is bound for glory. You need radical action? Matt Paxton is your man with an axe. Tearing down the rat house!

Commander Whitehead. Glen has a favorite rat out of the thousands of rats and it's named Commander Whitehead. 

Glen thinks the doctor is telling him that it was a female because it's name is Commander and that's not a feminine name. He told the vet, "Oh they have female commanders." Yeah, I think he was concerned about the babies she may have, Glen. I do appreciate that Glen is out there sticking up for us ladies though! Clean your crap up and find a new lady friend. You can do it, Glen! I believe in you and so does Matt Paxton.

Glen rules. Wow. Thank you for this after last weeks nasty pants people.

The rat collectors are trying to corral the rats. The bed is one giant rat nest. Scott says they have a sleep number of 7,000 rats. I'm glad we just got a regular mattress.

The animal/rat experts are asking him what he wants to do about a rat that got bit in the testicles. He's agreed to have him put to sleep. Big step for Glen I think. Ohhh this is where he loses it.

I love the tear down the wall music! Heck yeah. I listen to pump up music when I clean too! "I've got tales galore here." Part of the clean-up crew.

Glen was shocked to hear he had 2,000 rats in his house. Anyone worried about it, people are adopting the rats. 500 have found new homes already.

So what have I learned tonight? A Rat King can be lovable. In fact, he can win you over. He's looking for a therapist and still catching rats.

Lisa, Fullerton California. 
She's in, what she refers to as, the worst chapter of her life.

Lisa's Dad Bill own the house that Lisa trashed. There are cats and garbage everywhere. She says she lives with "numerous" cats. I am ready to find out what a hoarders definition of numerous is. Taking care of her cat hoard is a full time job for Lisa.

Sex offender's excuse for showing up at a 13 year olds house: Mentoring
Hoarders excuse for a house full of garbage, dead cats and poop: Collecting

Lisa doesn't know what she'll do if cats are gone. Lisa doesn't like the name "hoarder" she thinks it's like calling an alcoholic a drunk.

Lisa's home is a litter box. A giant litter box. "Office, catch-all, crash pad" That's where Lisa stays in her litter box/house. The cats make her get out of bed though. Maybe they want some privacy, lady! Cats value and need desire privacy.


40 cats have vanished. Lisa has them in some sort of cat hide-out. Someone saw her pushing them down the street in a shopping cart.

Lisa thinks her hoard is passive-aggressive. I feel like this all seems pretty aggressive-aggressive. Passive aggressive is saying something nasty and putting a ;) at the end of it and thinking that makes it okay. Dear users of the internet, no one thinks that makes what you're saying okay.

Lisa locked herself in the bathroom and now she's calling Cory from her toilet prison.

Who is this doctor? Whatever. I don't give a crap about him at this point. I want to, maybe he'll do something Paxton-like soon.

Lisa is blaming A&E for not getting the house cleaned and sanitized, but she won't let them leave. People, stop blaming A&E for these people. They are trying to help. Lisa is choosing hoarding over letting people clean her house for her. What a jackass.

Oh her poor Dad. He's going to have to evict his daughter. "I'll never be done with her because she's my daughter. I'm done with the way she lives." Bill, awesome Dad to a hoarder.

He couldn't evict her. She still hoards and collects cats.

Have a nice off-season, everybody!

11 comments:

client of his for 20 years said...

Glen is actually a really nice guy. His kids gotten taken away, found his father that commited suicide and lost his oldest son. He used to have this dog named oogie which went missing a few years ago (we think the people down on oasis road took him). Even though he has been through so many horrible things, he still keeps his head up high and smiles. His business is pumping water out of the ground and delivering it in a huge camo painted water truck. He didn't mention this but I am surprised he didn't talk about his children being gone. He is an extremely caring man, just ver misunderstood.

Gary's third pottery blog said...

(is this the dude with the handlebar stache and mullet????)

Reverend Awesome said...

He seemed really caring and really sweet. He almost seemed too fragile for this world. I'm glad that he's getting aftercare. He really seems like he will make it out of this.

Lisa on the other hand...well. Yeah. She was not interested in help or admitting her problem.

Erin from Boston said...

Glen was probably the most polite and agreeable subject the show has ever had. He knew he needed help and accepted it. He also took the aftercare. Keep your head up Glen!

Lisa, loading 40 cats into a shopping cart and pushing them down the street is pretty much denying every problem you have. I was sad for her father having to evict her. I was glad they said screw you and left her in her shit hole.

George and Maureen Johnson said...

My heart always goes out to these people. When I used to do testing on them, the MMPI, I would just sigh, and wish I had a magic wand for them to make their inner turmoil go away. Life is really damn hard, for all of us, and we have to be tough as nails sometimes. It's not by choice, it expected. As you pointed out his sensitivity, and loving ways the world has a way of slowly killing these people, one by one. We have no sympathy in this country for anything, nor anyone, that is not into major capitalism, the old ( those who die with the most toys win). Not everyone is into those lifestyles. When he lost his wife, that was the trigger for him to turn away from society, and find peace and solace in the rats. I see it as sad. Naturally my husband's comments are always on the comedic side, "Glen should of used a flute"! yes, I laughed, but not at Glen, just my husband's at times Immature nature. Our motto Laugh while you can, and don't let this world get you down. America truly is the best country in the world, wouldn't want to live anywhere else, but sometimes it's daunting to say the least being part of this society. Glen failed at being a "tough nut", with a highly competitive nature, and God forbid, don't ever show weakness.
Like the rats he cared for, you will get eaten alive! I also can't wait for "Scared Straight", now that is one scary Rat pen you don't want to be in Prison! YIKES

Reverend Awesome said...

HAHA! I bet it's fun watching TV with George. That's what I do when I watch it. Color commentary at the TV!

Glen was a gentleman. I loved his whole demeanor. It's no wonder he could live in a house full of rats and still have friends. He's a lovable dude! Hard to turn your back on someone like that.

I'm with you guys. Make the most of our time here. Laugh to keep from crying if you can.

Melissa Miller said...

I liked Glen too! I could not, however, make it through this episode because the rats crawling everywhere made me want to claw my skin off.

Lisa...shopping cart full of cats.....hoarder...I will just say that I will think of Lisa as a cautionary tale.

And Kasey, even though you're kind of famous now that you pal around with Matt Paxton, don't forget us little people!

Anonymous said...

Lisa was acting like a spoiled teenager, too bad for her that she refused the help.

Anonymous said...

Does anyone know if Lisa was ever evicted by her father? Curious as to whatever happened to her.

Anonymous said...

Like most of you, I really liked Glen! His whole life felt so tragic, I felt terrible for him and hoped the best. That's why I went looking for updates and discovered that he has met a tragic end. :( Someone broke into his house, tied him up, beat him within an inch of his life, then ransacked the place. He was found by an employee who went looking for him when he didn't show up for work, then he was taken immediately to the hospital, but he died shortly after. The criminal who killed and robbed him hasn't been caught yet. Poor, poor Glen!

You can read about it yourself if you Google "Glen Brittner Llano CA"

Anonymous said...

Like the anon above, I too was looking up information about Glen and ended up on this page after learning of his murder. I remember his as one of the more sympathetic cases presented on the show. Poor man seemed so genuinely good-hearted and so dogged by tragedy. It's terrible that this happened after he seemed to be in a place to get his life back together, and I hope they find justice for him soon.

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