Monday, September 20, 2010

Hoarders: Laura and Penny



Laura, 47. Tennessee.

She says she's a writer but she's disabled. Ummm. What disability keeps a person from writing? She says she has colon cancer. And to satisfy internet trolls...IM NOT A DOCTOR!!! Don't come to me for medical advice! Thank you.

"I'm living on borrowed time. I should be dead."

Her husband is a psychologist yet he can't help his own wife. He's living in garbage. 

Michelle is her daughter. She felt like her mother was always ruining their lives. 
For some reason another daughter is living there with her kid. 18 months old. Get babies out of here! Move out of your mom's house. 

"Dust, soot from the fireplace and there's probably some animal poop." Laura the Hoarder. When she said "poop" it really pooped.

It's Tonya Harding who we all learned last week is actually Robin Zasio.

Every house is always the WORST HOUSE they've ever been in. Bull shit! Tell me which one was the actual worst house. I don't believe a word you say from here on out. 

"The feces is just falling out of it." Tonya Harding. Oh yuck! It was just all over everything. Poop everywhere. Right next to beds and stuff. The shame has set in for the hoarder. 

The hoarder was crying then just got a nose bleed. Now she is catatonic and looks like Ozzy Osbourne. 

She's up and worried the cleaners didn't have masks on.

Now she's cleaned up and happy. Hopefully that lasts. Laura died September 15 at peace her family didn't have to clean up their mess.

Penny, 44 from Michigan. 

She works for the government. The federal government. I wonder what exactly she does. I'm betting on assassin.

Ladies and gentlemen, we've got poop.

This son thinks he's the new Dad and it's creepy and I don't care for it. He doesn't understand that they lost their electricity because his Mom doesn't pay bills. He just knows he can't call an electrician in cuz they will see the house and take him and his baby brother away.

Pete is Penny's brother. Henry is Penny's father. He owns the home.

The hoarding started when her Mom died. She died at 54.

She sleeps with her son on the sofa! Yuck City.

"In twenty years it's going to be twenty times as worse." Hoarder's kid and fill-in husband.

Bun hoarder lady! Suzanne Shebough

Penny's hoarding is at SEVERE LEVEL. Let's say that's Stage 5 Level.

I think the specialist should probably not refer to hoarding as "acquiring."

4 years ago an incident happened at her Dad's house that was very super traumatic and not good. It was a 44 room house with apartments in it and I don't know her Dad's new wife had to throw some things away and she just lost her shit about it. I think that's basically what's happening here.

"Oh Jesus. Get your door on straight at least." Scott

Oh it's the Certified Professional Organizer Specializing in Chronic Disorganization. She's got helmet hair. I kind of hate her. For no good reason.

Husband Son can't believe he let it get that bad. You see, he thinks he has to be the man of the house. That is just sooo creepy.

*Commercial Commentary* What's this shit about Tony Danza teaching kids? Let's not do that, America.

Oh great. Penny has a creepy doll of a young boy. It got thrown in a box with toys and she says it's an heirloom. She was certainly really concerned with it before when it was sitting in a pile o' garbage.

She looks like a lady version of John Lithgow. Lady John Lithgow Husband Son is going to need so much therapy.

*Commercial Commentary* The next episode promises to be the worst hoard the expert has ever seen. Yes, they all are the worst ever seen. Stage 5. Level Severe.

Husband Son is so happy he's balling his eyes out. Good god I feel so awful for him.

Oh look a futon without a cushion. Futons are uncomfortable enough with the cushion.

"That poor kid is a Lions fan. That's so sad." Scott

26 comments:

Leigh said...

Damn! I missed it again! Well, thanks for the update! ;)

Tiffany said...

Regarding Penny's door: I said "Why's her door falling off?" My husband said "It gave up." Ironically like Penny.

Gary's third pottery blog said...

nonono....

k.a. barnes said...

"lady version of John Lithgow"

Having. laughing. seizure.

Becky Jo said...

I wonder how hoarders become hoarders... like, how do the wires become crossed that makes people believe that they should keep animal poo?

Anonymous said...

what the fuck is ur problem the tv show is the one htat ripped the door off i sat there and whatched them u fucking retards

Reverend Awesome said...

Yes, we are retards. That is clearly a sign of mental retardation to miss that. Good for you and your high IQ that you caught that. What ever would we do without you anonymous? Oh just continue to enjoy ourselves on the internet? Well what's the fun in that.

Becky said...

I had to read the post by Anonymous about four times to understand it because it's lacking punctuation, full words, and capital letters. Geezus.

Reverend Awesome said...

Well you can see why Anonymous was pissed, I mean, THE TV SHOW REMOVED THE DOOR! Obviously that's reason to be angry at strangers and question their mental abilities.

Becky said...

I don't know what I was thinking by judging you, Anonymous. Please forgive me... or not.

Anonymous said...

ya and you dumb asses obviously you have problems of your own if you have to jump to conclusions they take 4 days and show you 22 minutes of it and you people believe it they tell people to do sertain things so they can get people like you to be amazed trust me i was there for all four days of the tourture and no the reason the electricity went out was because the wires got loose and you think she is an assasin maybe if she was they should send her out for you so that she can blow your fucking brains out

Reverend Awesome said...

Listen, if you think living in squalor is reasonable that's your thing. I don't agree with it and find it disgusting, but if you don't then you are SERTAINLY entitled to that opinion.

I'm sorry, I need to end this comment. There is a woman in a tree outside. She may be a sniper.

Reverend Awesome said...

And you are posting death wishes from a Monroe Public School ISP? Good. Excellent. I'll let them know what their technology is being used for.

Becky said...

Oh Kasey... I can't stop laughing. Make it stop.

Anonymous said...

Isn't there a difference between hoarding (keeping junk, acquiring junk, not trashing junk, getting more junk) and being a flat-out total pig?
It's one thing if you can't throw those Barry Manilow decorative plates out, quite another to keep the turds around in such a loving fashion.

Anonymous said...

This family was obviously in dire need of help and clearly reached out for it. Unfortunately the only way they can get help is on television so all can judge. Could you imagine not having the resources to receive help for a personal issue? And the only help you can get is to be humiliated in public? Then have others discuss it and make up their own conclusions about your life, your feelings, your problems? At the very least this show should block out the children to protect them. Can you imagine how that child felt going to school after that aired? I hope everything worked out for those boys and the whole family. I will never watch another show like that again. I realize this show aired 4 years ago but I just saw it tonight as a rerun but how they put those kids with their faces showing and emotions showing it just doesn't feel right morally or ethically, At least in my opinion

Summer Dayz said...

The idiot who wrote this has no idea about colon cancer. It is NOT automatically stage 4 "in the colon". Sheesh.

Reverend Awesome said...

Well I'm glad, with the exception of you Summer Dayz, people don't stop by my mostly defunct blog for medical insight.

TInaB said...

Colon cancer in NOT automatically stage 4!!! Get an education before posting ignorant comments. My dad had stage 1, which is easily survivable if treated correctly. My grandma had stage 4 and died. While people can survive stage 4, it's potentially more deadly, as it is much more difficult to treat, and often comes back somewhere else (metastasis). Read about colon cancer online from a reputable source like the Mayo clinic before saying such an uneducated thing. As you know, the woman in Hoarder episode died...which was not surprising at all to those of us that properly understand staged cancer.

TinaB said...

While passionate feedback can be misconstrued as deliberate trolling, there is no mistaking that it was pretty cool of you to remove the cancer commentary. :)

Reverend Awesome said...

This blog post is 4 years old, as I had written in the post it was something that was said while my grandfather was in the hospital, my grandfather that has since passed away. I'm glad I could satisfy the totally untrolling comments by removing that for you. The internet can go on once again.

TinaB said...

Gotcha. Sorry to hear about your grandfather. I visited my aunt in hospice to say goodbye yesterday. Damn freakin' cancer. And the internet goes on...

DrJayDrJay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
DrJayDrJay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
DrJayDrJay said...

Hahaha. Bloody hell - Reverend, I've been laughing so hard reading through all of this, the Hoarder summary (which was SPOT on btw, just finished watching it myself and had the exact same thoughts...except the Tonya Harding quack - I don't see it and I actually like her...but she does have that Jersey Shore 90s hairsprayed pulled back tight trailer trash ... oh yeah, i see what you mean...) and even the comments but particularly your replies. Didn't realise you guys had wry humour out in Des Moines ; )

Not trying to resurrect your mostly defunct now 5-year-old blog, but I've been enjoying it so much I think I may just have wet meself a wee bit.

Maybe you could provide me with some medical advice, cuz I was thinking of picking up Stage 4 colon cancer some time next week...OMG! NOT Stage FOUR! I mean Stage ONE, stage TWO or something...I sure as feck don't want the non-trolling medical internet police catching me out on my ignorance of The Four Stages of Colon Cancer...Man, that made me look stupid, almost as stupid as not knowing that it was the TV CREW THAT BROKE THE FRONT DOOR. I must be a dumbarse.

Thanks again for the hearty pre-nighty-night laughs. I am becoming addicted to this Hoarder show and judging nasty people and yelling at the TV screen how nasty they are. Will try to check out some more tomorrow!

Reverend Awesome said...

Thank you, DrJay! That's very kind of you. I still get comments on here every once and a while, but I normally don't respond. This was so nice I had to jump back into the fray. I'd be glad to advise you on all things pertaining to your colon. I am, as you know, the expert.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...