Sunday, May 23, 2010

WWKD: Public Sex

DEAR WWKD-
How do you react when you come across people f!!king in the bushes??? We did, yesterday, at a kid's baseball game. They were not exactly buff types, and we moved away quickly. Laughing. Never seen that sh!t before.
ANYWAY, the wife is like "do we call the police?" and then a little kid is chasing a baseball over by them.... shoot. We don't know what happened in the end, there were dozens of people nearby! Is it that they want to scr3w where little kids are playing baseball and the parents are there, so they can get caught? So people will watch???? Was this just something to do while the kids were playing baseball? Multi-tasking, like? We walked by today and sure enough, flattened grass and some crumpled tissues....
That dude's azz haunts my dreams..
anyway, what do ya do?
a) call the cops?
b) throw sh!t at them?
c) stand there and laugh?
d) the wife says take pictures (!!!!) and get the plate number and call the cops
e) my favorite, find some way to steal their clothes or car keys and see how they deal with that....I mean, if people are f!!king, they are NOT watching their clothing on the ground...
f) a friend joked "go join!" ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Need help Rev.....


I would go with a nice healthy dose of c, d and e. Pictures FOR SURE. Those are the kinds of moments that you want documented for future generations. At least there is the story. Use your imagination, world!

I'm sure they were doing it for the thrill. Perhaps they get off on the sounds of a little league umpire. You just can't get that kinda atmosphere at home, no matter how hard you try. There is someone out there that's into everything.

It's best to leave the cops out of public sex situations amongst consenting adults. It's something that could end up scarring witnesses, but mostly it'll just give them a good story.

3 comments:

Tiffany said...

People really do this? Wow...

I loved the line about 'flattened grass'. lol!

Becky Jo said...

I kind of think setting their clothes on fire would be funny... NOOO! Not our clothes!!!! They'd probably stop the activities and try to save the clothes.

Gary's third pottery blog said...

TRvUE STORY! Doggy style no less, with that dude's big azz pointed our way. ick! The FIRST time I have seen anything like that. Except for the woman giving that dude a hummer in a Chicago park one morning, but that involved both parties remaining dressed, you know?
Thanks REV, no doubt the sound of an umpire is QUITE stimulating to some...

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