Monday, February 1, 2010

Hoarders Recap (You're Welcome, Becky)

It's Monday. Dun Dun Dunnnn...Time for Hoarders!
Do you guys know what was on before Hoarders this evening? Huffers Intervention Special. Yes, it was featuring Allison the huffer. She's doing great, everybody.

Jill-Grandmother was a hoarder, married.

Jill and her son both have severe allergies. The house makes it terrible. Now she's saying she tries not to vacuum so she won't stir up dust. Come on, lady. You are killing your son.

Jill is wearing a jean shirt. Those are just super terrible to me. I don't wear jeans. To imagine jean all over my arms and by my neck (cuz of course it has a collar) is just vile. BLAH!

1-10 on an allergen/mold scale, she's living in a 10. With severe allergies.

OH MY FREAKING GOD! Shes in IOWA! Springville! Whoa. My mind is blown.

"So I'm storing her crap" Hoarders son

OH! Her son, Spencer has been sneaking garbage into the garage so he can secretly throw them away!! That's AWESOME! Some teens try to steal their parent's booze others try to throw away their parents garbage. She is super upset that he wants to throw away his old Boy Scout uniform.

Hoarding expert is telling the Mom and her son they need to act like adults. They do.
ALMOST A LEVEL 5!! These hoarding experts LOVE to bring that term out. That is pathways through the house. That's the clue they just gave us about their made up term.

Her and her son were apparently power struggling the first day so now he's not helping.

This mom is hoarding hair! Super long hair and middle aged/elder ladies is soo gross. It's to her waist. Too long.

Snot City, USA She's having an allergy attack.

Dust Wolf! He is holding a gob of dust. She called it a dust bunny. He explained that it is, in fact, a dust wolf.

Still, amongst all the clutter, she put up a Christmas tree.

She's all clean. Yay! She's a nut bird, but she's okay.

Tra (Pronounced 'Tray')-He's a fire fighter.

Oh his boss was sent out to check out his house. To inspect it. That would be SOOO embarrassing! Imagine your boss coming to root around through your house.

He feels violated if people clean up for him. He thinks they are throwing stuff away behind his back and violating him.

Says he's numb to the mess, but knows he has a problem. Trash makes him sad. That's pretty much what happens. It makes him sad to throw garbage away.

He has perfectionist tendencies. He can't organize things because if it's not done perfect he just gives up.

So she says what she has to do is help him to "reduce his perfectionism" and that just seems weird to me. He's a perfect mess.
Ok. Never mind. There is someone I know that has been called "a perfectionist" except she's just really thoroughly imperfect. Goes to all kinds of trouble to be wrong.

His firefighting job is at risk. At risk cuz of his filth. Wouldn't that be weird? You're too gross at home to work here. They are saying because he can't make a decision to throw something away he can't make a decision at work. That's their new thing. The firefighters are being jerks. Who invited them to clean up day?

Tra is mad at unsolicited advice. I get mad at that too, Tra! I can relate. Get your unsolicited life advice out of my life. Though, I think his is kind of solicited since he called Hoarders.

Tra has dozens of remotes. He is mad he might not have enough now because he thinks people threw them away.

His Mom is a B. His Sister is kind of a B.

HOARDING TOOTHBRUSHES. They are all over his house. He is worried he won't be able to find the kind he likes so he keeps buying them up.

Mom and Sis need to skedaddle. They are hurting more than they're helping.

Tra is all cleaned up!


Becky Jo said...

Thanks! I knew you'd come through on the Hoarders update. Seriously, there is someone in Iowa?! I'm embarrassed... here I was, thinking we were perfect.

That first lady makes me ill. Collecting hair? Dust Wolf?? ..and she wonders why her allergies act up...

If Tra is a firefighter, what if there is a fire, and he has to RUN out of his house to the station... what if he trips over a pile of crap, another pile of crap falls on him... and he can't get up?!

Gary's third pottery blog said...

OMIGOSH! I am glad you watch and report, SO I DON'T HAVE TO!

Reverend Awesome said...

There haven't been dead cats or piles of poop for weeks!

Fran said...

You know, I think the Allison episode is everyone's fave Intervention. It's definitely the most entertaining and ridiculous. They play it all the freaking time!

Carbon_13 said...

This shit is hilarious...I only joined this thing to follow you. I always miss hoarders and appreciate your reccaps.

Reverend Awesome said...

Oh my goodness! Carbon_13! Thank you! I will not let you down. Never not recap. That's my new motto.

carbon_13 said...

Yes, please always "reccap" (I swear I can spell recap). I think it's funnier reading the recaps after having watched the show...but bad short-term memory. I love and this reminds me of it. :)

carbon_13 said...

Apparently forgot my password...too much weed.

Reverend Awesome said...

I too am a huge fan! Love Michael K!
I will not let you down, new reader.
I'll reCCap the hell out of Hoarders tomorrow.

Carbon_13 said...

Looking forward to it!

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