Monday, January 25, 2010

Hoarders!

The exclamation point is so you guys get excited about it. Seriously. Just watch it. I swear if you do you'll find my observations mildly interesting. In the meantime just let me be great.

Warren*(You'll see why there is an asterisk)-45, admitted hoarder

His wife calls him a MAJOR hoarder. I'd say that's probably a level 5. She is "drowning in a sea of stuff"

There's an ultimatum here. Clean or he's gone.

Their poor little 3 year old is a clean freak. Grandpa is fucking pissed, as he should be. His grandson in that filth getting his head all screwed up.

We have had a poop free couple of months here on Hoarders. I don't know what the deal is. The season was front heavy in shit.

The expert called him the "SICK model" then said that means, Sensitive, Intelligent, Creative + Kind. I can see that. These hoarding experts LOVE to make up terms. Love it. So do I.

*This wife is just sure she's not a hoarder. It's all her husband's fault. Own up to your garbage, woman!

Leanne (his wife) is THE LAZIEST. REVELATION! She's the hoarder, not Warren!


This lady is just so super lazy and weird. She wants to just stay on the first floor. OH they convinced her to go down in the basement. She hasn't been in her very own basement for 5 years. Ok. I guess she can't make it down the stairs because she weighs too much. She won't let things be thrown away.

OLD TUNA down in the basement. She won't let it be thrown away. She says it's not expired. Well it's basement tuna. Don't eat basement tuna.

He has the van that his Dad died in. He's not ready to let go of it. The expert thinks in time he will be. I think so too. He's an alright dude.

"I love my wife and I love my son to the max." Warren

Leanne is a huge electrosol hoarder.

Gail-64, she's on disability and social security (This must have some bearing on this episode. I don't know why they mentioned it)

She likes history and collecting things. That's what she says. She needs to keep history alive.

She's been living out of her bedroom for 2.5 years. Unreasonable. This is a 3 story house of garbage.
This broad lives in a 3 story house and she's living out of 1 room. She has a mini-fridge, heater and a microwave all in her bedroom.

She had a house fire at one point. Pre-hoarding days. I guess that's how the hoarding started. She lost all her stuff once. There. Diagnosed.

She's keeping an old toilet lid. "Probably put it on my toilet" that's what she's going to do with it.

She is the grump! All the sudden. She needs a freaking nap.

Oh she's got mannequins. Anyone that owns a mannequin is automatic weirdo. That's just the way the world works.

Want to keep her hot pants from the 70's. Shes 64, on disability. Picture it. HOT PANTS.

She has a couch she says she's getting reupholstered. It was at once point some sort of mouse condo. She's keeping it. "They aren't in it now"

Gail is a straight shooter. I can respect that.

All hoarders cleaned up and doing good. Except the van is still there.

2 comments:

Becky Jo said...

I'm glad you do this Hoarders run down for us. I have a big banner on my computer screen that says "Why aren't you making pots?"... You giving me the important highlights saves me all kinds of time.

Reverend Awesome said...

YES! I have a sense of purpose now. Thank you!
I watch bad tv so you don't have to, but you totally should.

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