Monday, October 26, 2009

WWKD?

Dear Reverand Awesome,
Very fitting title by-the-way. I have a question regarding a situation I witnessed today. I was in a public area when I came across a man laying on his side in the grass. Mind you the weather was chilly and this man was not wearing a coat. I see sitting beside him a motorized scooter thingy. His wife, or who I assumed to be his wife, is standing next two him, as are two teenagers (possibly his children). The teenage girl gets onto the motorized wheelchair and starts driving it around, meanwhile the man is still laying on the ground. Everyone is staring and I debated offering my assistance, but then heard the wife say he was fine. I walk ahead and, suddenly, there is the man on his motorized wheel chair tearing up the sidewalk like a bat out of hell. His wife is chasing close behind. Then the teenagers proceed to come up and cut us off in line in what seems to be a search for this wheelchair nut. I guess my question is what would you do in this situation and please keep in mind that you are aggravated by the fact that these teens cut ahead and then the girl, again, was riding around on the scooter thing! Oh, and do you advise yelling at people that piss you off in public or biting your tongue?

Oh, and another quesiton I have is: What purpose do red-heads serve in the universe? What happens if you find you are slightly attracted to a red-head?


I’m a yelling at people advocate. Especially teens. Is there no end to their reign of terror? Jesus. Anytime you have an opportunity to yell at a teen, take it. The only time I don’t think you should yell at people is if you think they might have a weapon. Then it’s best to quietly wish the person harm.
If I were in this situation I would probably call the teens gross/disgusting twats. If you were in a crowd you could all join forces against the teens. Hating teens brings people together.

Red heads have no purpose that’s why they are going extinct.
This a tough question. Do you think this slight attraction could lead to full blown attraction? Keep in mind you won’t only have to get used to the red hair on his head. Still attracted? It was meant to be. Conan is a red head. I find him attractive. Funny people can get away with having red hair. Let’s be honest, funny people can get away with a lot. Think of all the fun ginger jokes you’ll be able to make! Go for it. I’ve talked myself into talking you into it. Give the ginger a chance. The first time you do it refer to him as “fire crotch.” Hope that helps. OH and after you do it please contact me and tell me about it, by "it" I mean his pubes. Thanks.

8 comments:

Gary Rith Pottery Blog said...

sure, you want to know if the carpet matches the drapes....

Reverend Awesome said...

Yes, That is what I'd like to know.

Eva M. said...

i'm a bit offended....
as my hubby is a firecrotch.
fire crotch, chest, and ass to be exact.
what's wrong with redheads?
you're racist.
yes i mean racist.
cause their skin is a pale ass redish white with freckles. whose else is?
racists.

Reverend Awesome said...

There you go, ladies and gentleman. A Ginger Enthusiast. Take note.

I will admit, red heads certainly are not my thing. I also don't care for blondes. They remind me of Steve Sanders, 90210. Gross.

Fran said...

Eva-
You're hubby is definately excluded from this red-head debate.

Steve Sanders...bahahahahah (Ian Ziering as my brother remembered) is very unattractive. His curls definitely did not help.

I don't know, personally, but I think the carpet would match the drapes. Funny, cuz I have always wondered that about blondes.


Every time I hear "fire-crotch red" I think of Betsy saying it repeatedly at a slumber party. Makes me laugh every time!

Carbon_13 said...

Hey! I'm a ginger!

Reverend Awesome said...

But you are a ginger lady. That is totally acceptable.
Conan and Prince Harry are some attractive ginger dudes. That's pretty much where my attractive ginger man list ends.

Carbon_13 said...

I can't find ginger men attractive because I feel as if I'm related to every ginger I see...

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