Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Ok. Dallas Center is wonderful and it’s also super weird. Sometimes my parents or brother will act like I should move there. No way, Jose! It’s fine times to visit and it’s an interesting place, but everyone being involved in everyone else’s business is not for me.
My mom is still home recovering from her surgery and also losing her mind wanting to get out of the house...
When I was over there the other day some random Hispanic guy was parked in front of the house when I got back from the pharmacy. He was wondering if a car THAT DID NOT HAVE A FOR SALE SIGN IN THE WINDOW was for sale. Whiskey-Tango-Foxtrot? Who does that? My mom tells me it happens sometimes. Usually it’s the guys from the hardware store. Fucking weird. Talk to my Dad, buddy! Leave the ladies of the home alone.
I get a call at work today. A bonnet (this is a Baker family term for Brethren) man came to the door asking about the apple tree in the back yard. Could he have some. My Mom said that was fine he could have some. He asked her how many she wanted! Apparently it’s ok to ask strangers for apples. Whatever.
Then I get another call. “Kasey, something very weird is happening. This place is too strange during the day. I need a camera.” Oh shit. What?! Well the back yard now has over a half dozen bonnet people in it. ON LADDERS! Women in their dresses and children, all gathering my parents apples. Bonnet Male brings my mom a bucket of her own apples to keep!
I tell my mom, “you need to stop answering the door.” Her response, “Well that’s stupid! Like my front door says, ‘any weirdo please stop!’ It takes nerve, I think.”
Then she started telling me earlier a truck stopped in front of the house. She was all worried. “What are they going to want now!?” It was just someone fixing the street.
If they don’t get out of there before Dad gets home he’s going to freak out. Mom says she’s just staying in bed.
Grow your own damn apple tree, Bonnets!